Parents: Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. As college students, we are going through an interesting time with our parents. Most of us have moved out of our parents' homes and away from their constant supervision. We want to control our own lives. However, most of us still count on our parents to bail us out in troublesome situations, like when we run short of money. Our parents struggle with this new dynamic as well. Many parents want to hang onto the kind of control they always had over their children's lives. They have to cope with losing the day-to-day interaction they were accustomed to.
Sometimes, parents who can't quite cope with the newfound distance of their children become "helicopter parents." Helicopter parents hover over their children throughout college, monitoring their lives and academics. Last Monday, the National Survey of Student Engagement released information showing that helicopter parents have some positive effects. According to the report, students in frequent communication with their parents and whose parents often intercede on their behalf are more engaged in their schoolwork. They are more likely to have discussions with professors, participate in intensive writing exercises and do independent research. College students with involved parents also report higher levels of satisfaction with every aspect of college life.
However, these students often get lower grades than students with less-involved parents. Some college officials hypothesize that this occurs because parents of less intelligent students feel a heightened need to be involved. Or is it that students with overly active parents never learned to function on their own?
It is no surprise that students with helicopter parents report higher levels of satisfaction with college life. They are not fully making the tough adjustments that everyone has to make to cross the bridge into adulthood. In college, students usually take on more responsibility. If we want to eat, we must buy food. If we want to smell decent, we must do laundry. And, most importantly, we must learn to plan our own schedules and how to study if we want to do well in school.
Students will never be prepared to face the real world on their own if their parents hold their hands through college. When the time comes for them to have to think and plan for themselves, they won't know where to start. Students who learn to handle collegiate stresses on their own and function with some distance from their parents now will be better off when they graduate. They may not be as satisfied with their lives right now, but they are on their way to an independent future, not back to a room in their parents' house.
Sheridan is a Plan II and political communications sophomore.
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