Daily Texan Columnist
Oh, dear reader, how I have misunderstood you. I spent my entire weekend preparing a wonderful defense of Bush and his DUI arrest those many years ago. Oh, how I wanted to point out the different cultural attitude concerning drunk driving in the free and easy '70s. I planned to convince you that we should not judge Bush by the standards of the current times for something done in a completely different social context. But now it seems you don't really care about it one way or the other. In fact, in these final days, you don't seem fazed by any aspect of this campaign at all. You don't even bat your pretty little eyelashes when the horrible, ugly, Perot monster tries to stick its head in the middle of your election party. But first let's talk about Bush.
A Washington Post poll, taken the day after the story broke indicates that even among undecided voters the aftershock of the DUI revelation is negligible. Only 6 percent of those polled said they were less likely to vote for Bush in light of the DUI, and, amazingly, 5 percent said they were MORE likely to support Bush. Presidential politics aside, what kind of person likes a politician better because that politician has a DUI on their record? The all-important, pro-drunk driving voting bloc must be at work here.
Even Mothers Against Drunk Driving National President Millie I. Webb doesn't seem too shaken up about it. "As Governor Bush's arrest happened nearly 25 years ago, we hope that the experience had an impact on his life and helped him to realize the devastation that can result from getting behind the wheel after drinking alcohol," Webb explained. Where's the outrage? Where's the indignation? I can't defend Bush if you're not pissed at him.
The DUI has had about as much impact on this election as Ross Perot's vacuous endorsement of Bush on Larry King. Why did Larry King give Perot any air time at all? He knew Perot would just look directly at the camera and give some half-hearted lecture to America's youth about the importance of the election. Perot is the nation's half-senile grandfather. He's convinced that we're all going to hell, but he's not in touch enough with today's society to make any meaningful contributions.
So why did Larry King waste our time by putting him on the air? It seems King made the same mistake that I did. He thought the election was still a hot issue, that people wanted to know more about it.
Nope. The American public has decided who they're going to vote for and there's not a damn thing anybody can do about it. You don't care about the DUI or Perot's endorsement one way or another because you've already decided who you're going to vote for and nothing short of a candidate caught trading orphans for crack would get you to change your mind.
If you're an undecided voter, there isn't any issue out there that would push you to one side of the fence or the other that hasn't already been covered ad nauseam. Who exactly are you undecided voters anyway? What glorious sign from God are you waiting for in order to make up your mind? Just flip a coin, and put all of us out of our misery, please.
So what do we do the day before the election? Let's turn off the TV, put down the paper and get back to real life. The media is trying to squeeze the election for everything it's worth. Election coverage spans the spectrum from the mundane to the ridiculous, from tracking polls in swing states to Perot's endorsement and Bush's DUI.
Take the day off, dear reader. If you already know who you're going to vote for, anything that happens today probably won't change your mind. And if you're undecided at this point, you'll be just as undecided when you enter the booth. Take a walk in the rain, read a book, go see a movie. Your job is done don't let the media use you to increase their ratings.
I'll see you in the park.
Jones is an English senior
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