Editor’s note: This is an advice column written by in-house know-it-all Riley Brands. All answers are based on personal experience. Brands is not a licensed professional. Questions for Brands can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
I have been struggling with my feelings recently over this guy I work with. He’s a total flirt, and everybody at work thinks so. He seems to really like me, and I just like him only a little. His flirtiness really turns me off, and we’re totally different, in terms of morals and our interests. He’s sweet, but I can’t tell if he’s genuine. Mainly, I’m scared of what people at work will think if they find out I’ve been dating him. Is that shallow? Plus, I’m going back to school soon, and I don’t want to waste my time. Help me, please!
Shallow and Confused
Dear Shallow and Confused,
Based on what you’ve told me, I don’t think y’all are a good match. You’re not on the same page emotionally or morally, and the physical distance will only make matters worse. As hard as it can be to let someone go when you clearly have feelings for him or her, you’re going to have to cut him loose, preferably sooner rather than later. You don’t want to lead him on any more than necessary, for both your sake and his. Of course it will sting when you deliver the bad news, but he must know that this relationship can’t last forever given that you’re only home for the summer.
Now, as to what your co-workers will think: You certainly have a legitimate concern; everyone wants to be accepted by their peer group. However, you’re not going to be working there much longer, so why worry about the opinions of people whom you’re likely never going to see again after this month?