Editor's Note: The following is a Daily Texan -30- column. In the typewritten days of the newspaper industry, "-30-" denoted the end of a story. A -30- column gives graduating staff members an opportunity to reflect and speak their mind
For the love of God, read a book.
I became the book critic for the Texan out of disgust. After three years of reading this paper, I had seen more video game reviews and anime criticism than I had read even references to popular books. So one day while I was particularly enraged, I flew down to the basement and applied, only to find there wasn't even a position for book reviewer on the application. When I asked why, the answer was simple: There just isn't a demand for book news like there is for the latest scoop on the next GTA.
It was true. Later that September, the National Endowment for the Arts released the Reading at Risk report stating that American generally aren't reading fiction like they used to - or at all. So over the past year I've made it my mission to incite reading. I've tried to pick books that appealed to college audiences that weren't dummy beach books.
After a year of working for the Texan, I'm not sure I've made any difference, so here's my last ditch effort: I'm giving away all of my special secrets about reading that I've learned over the years as a book nerd/snob.
Fiction is it
Good fiction holds the meaning of life and hands you all its secrets. For the love of God, just read.
Here's how
First of all, see the end of this article for The List. Once you have read all of these, go to a library and ask a librarian. Tell them what you like, and they will help you . They are magic people.
If that doesn't work, read an anthology such as "The Paris Review Book" or "The Best American Non-Required Reading." Anthologies are the buffets of literature. It gives you a little taste of everything. You can go back to the library for more.
Read the first page, not the back blurb. The author's style is much better indicator of things to come than any jazzed up back-of-the-book preview.
How to read: three things you must know
You don't have to read the whole book. Bottom line: Unless you're reading Wharton, Dickens, Marquez or any classic Russian author, if you don't like the book by page 25, it's probably not going to get better. Just move on! If you find yourself stuck on a book for more than a month, dump it!
You are allowed to skim: It's a fact: many books today are simply not edited well enough. Due to tight deadlines and publishing house greed, the fine-tooth editing of yesteryear no longer exists. Meanwhile, you still want to know how it ends, but you don't want to slug through the next 300 pages to find out. What to do? Skim it! And if by the end of the book you feel like you've missed something, you can always go back and reread.
Still think skimming is a sacrilege? I think the poor editing that wastes readers' time is a sacrilege.
You can be friends with Cliff: Sometimes, friends, Cliff's blessed notes are the only way to finish a book. And if you're not reading it for a class, I doubt you have the contextual bearing to understand, in depth, what Dostoyevsky portrayed or the sheer stamina to power through the rough patches.
About contemporary fiction: Reading is intellectual nourishment. Using the recently outdated metaphor of the food pyramid, here's how it works: The literary classics (anything that has its own Cliff's Notes) and good contemporary works (anything printed in the Paris Review) are your bread and grains. These works should make up the majority of your reading diet. Then non-genre fiction (regular novels such as "High Fidelity" by Nick Hornby or "The Joy Luck Club" by Amy Tan) and decent genre novels (Anne Rice vampire novels, Larry McMurty westerns) make up the fproduce portion. The lesser genre books (Stephen King, John Grisham, Chick Lit) fill in the meat niche (note: This is not modeled on the Adkins diet). And the books to read in moderation, the symbolic fats and oils, are the serial fantasy, romance, science fiction, mystery and true crime books. Yes, this includes Harry Potter for anyone over 12. Why? Because you are over 12.
The List: I've concocted a list of categories of which a well-rounded reader should read at least one example.
Categories
Ridiculously long novel
Why? So you can say you've read something this long. And the longer classics are usually the best.
"The Brothers Karamazov" by Dostoyevsky, "Don Quijote" by Miguel Cervantes, "Middlemarch" by George Elliot, "Moby-Dick" by Herman Melville
Linguistically wacky book that presents a story in a new way
Why? To see that there is more than the "exposition-conflict-rising action-climax" template for storytelling.
"A Clockwork Orange" by Anthony Burgess, "Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man" by James Joyce, "Jasmine" by Bharati Mukherjee
Classic children's book that's really an all-ages book
Why? The biggest truths often come in small packages.
"The Little Prince" by Antoine by Saint-Exupery, "Where the Sidewalk Ends" by Shel Silverstein, "The Velveteen Rabbit" by Margery Williams
Shakespeare
Why? He's the best we've got.
Everything's good, but for novice Shakespeare readers, avoid "Love's Labour's Lost," "Cymbeline," "A Winter's Tale," "Pericles," "Julius Caesar" and most of the history plays
Visceral war book
Why? Watch the news.
"The Things They Carried" by Tim O'Brien, "Catch-22" by Joseph Heller
Postmodern/post-postmodern novel
Why? I don't know either.
"White Noise" by Don DeLillo, "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius" by Dave Eggers
Texas books that don't suck
Why? There are a lot of "Texas" books that do.
Anything from Lone Star Literature edited by Don Graham.
New science fiction
Why? Just to see that this much-belittled genre has evolved from its primitive Star-Trek-in-print form.
"Cryptonomicon" by Neal Stephenson
High-brow literary short stories
Why? They make life worth living.
A book by the Paris Review or a compilation of The New Yorker stories
Books that disturb
Why? Because you'll like them. And even if you don't, you won't be able to stop thinking about them.
"Lolita" by Vladamir Nabokov,
"1984" by George Orwell
Expansive American books
Why? Because you're American, damn it
"Cannery Row" by John Steinbeck, "Invisible Man" by Ralph Ellison, "Sister Carrie" by Theodore Drieser
The Final Secret
Books will change your life.
"The Caveat"
If you let them.
My last unsolicited piece of advice is this: when you read these books, get involved with them. Let your guard down and be manipulated by the author--get mad at the characters, cry because of the ending, laugh stupidly at the goofy parts. Get your friends involved, form a book club, make your parents read, give books as gifts. Just read. For the love of God, just read.
I'd like to thank Erin, Matt, Mom, Lolly, and dad for all of the support. Thank you to the handful of loyal readers. Revolution!
Christine Newgard was a comics writer 2002-2003 and has written book reviews since summer 2004.
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